d30 Crowd sourced "Jerk henchmen" table

I rejoined mewe last week, I had taken a bit of a break from RPGs and social media while working thru a lot of tests for my job. Jumped on the osr forum and suggested creating a table. Here you go.

Big thanks to: Arthur B, GLG Johua, Shane E, Bud, Steve C, Rod T, Kryinn E, 

1.  Bakall, never seems to have a sharp weapon, or a weapon handy.

2.  Awet, runs at every monster, except rats. Totally skeeved out by rats.

3.  Magal, greedy swordsman that counts loot whilst engaged in combat.

4 Ronaldie, wildly flatulent.

5.  Jessica - has gotten banned from every tavern on the coast due to her wandering hands.

6.  Nutsy, always leaving a trail of peanut shells wherever he goes. Occasionally, the odd person turns pale at this and quickly moves away.

7.  Barrelhouse Baskil, a mediocre and craven swordsman, who constantly subverts the characters plans by saying "You really think that's a good idea? Huh."

8.  Jaynal the Anal. A foppish middle-aged human who constantly complains about everything.

9.Born Again Bran, overshares his personal Testimony, loudly, every time the party stops.  Worse, he's a Nugganite from Discworld.

10 grojan, always wants to turn right in the dungeon

11 some people call him Tim! He always suggests the longest way possible

12.  Terrek the Foppish, a mediocre wizard with great taste in foppish hats.

13 quibd, stops to tie his shoes at inopportune times.

14.  Kam Fantac, illustrious thief and bard, who sings about all his party's recent exploits...

15.  Gotago - needs a pit stop 10 minutes after the party enters the dungeon.

16.  Tassel, barbarian braggart that suffers from extreme rhabdophobia, to the chagrin of the party wizard...

17). Tanzer, M-U, won't stop talking about how everyone confuses him with Tenser.

18 Neb, critizes all party decisions, doesn't offer solutions until after. Woulda coulda shoulda.

19.  Pardu of Pallmall  - stalwart lancer who frequently talks about how cool his previous adventuring party was - their priest had the best God  ever, their magic user knew the most awesome spells...

20 Laz, carries a large extremely dull sword.  Which matches his wits.

21.  Nudford is a wiry halberdier who has a monster brain eating fetish; he sometimes "accidentally" makes too much noise to attract them.

22.  Rasp, a cursed cleric with two tongues, you never really know which one to believe...

23.  Money Bags, the party gambler who looses half the loot carousing in the tavern on the first night back. At least he always makes certain that sacks don't have holes, like that wretch, Spills...

24.  Harkin, Spends most of the time charming himself into oblivion.  The rest of the time he smokes random plants he finds and dries.  

25.  Galwit, Much better than his brother Halfwit who died when a tree he was cutting fell on him.  Galwit tends to tell that story often, even to people who have heard it before.  

26.  Horah, A wonderfully excellent thief, her sneak ability is a bit low due to the rather large heeled boots she wears.  

27.  Goolang, A troubadour who only sings songs that rhyme on sundays.  Every other day are haiku's that are in a extremely weird time signature.  

28.  Nahgi, claims to have every alchemist ingredient known to man and elf in her backpack.  In reality, the backpack contains dust, spider webs, weird triangular shaped dice, and medieval hair spray

29.  Abrati, A reknown healer, who is a complete fraud.  He does however talk a big talk, and every town he enters people know of him, they tend to even give him money.  

30.  Jabjib, An half orcish smuggler, who wears rather loud jingly bells on his boots. 

This is the kick in the ass I needed

If you haven't noticed the maps I've been working on latetly, they are all here in this collection.  I had this idea for a dungeon rolling around in my head, and it's getting there.  It is starting to take shape.  The inspiration for it is coming directly from guys like +Zak Sabbath and +Mike Evans and the things I was reading while Gen Con was going on.  Specifically about the DIY D&D Community.  And the conversation about making games & adventures that YOU the author want to play.  The biggest problem I find, is the moment when I start worrying about what someone else is going to think.  In some cases, people might think "well that's commercial suicide, to pander to the masses".  And in a sense I suppose that could be correct.  However, that's not really what I'm talking about here, I'm talking about this little 5 level dungeon I'm mapping and working on.  And how I'll probably put it out there for people at some point, but way before that I'm going to run my players thru it, probably TPK them.  And way before it comes out, I'm going to start creating terrible "shane" art for it, because it makes me happy.

So here's the maps.  And eventually this may exist in some medium that you can download and run.

Or it may just be the place where my players characters go to die for the next few months.

In the mean time I'm going to sit on my couch with a glass of tea, an old black cat sitting beside me, and "friends" on in the background and doodle to my hearts content.  Who knows, it may end up being a bit bigger than 5 levels.

d20 Somewhat Unique Bad Guys

Tired of the typical bad guys? Here's a d20 table with some strange ones.

1.  Vegetarian Ogre Tribe.
2.  Three Eyed Skunk Man Hybrid with a penchant for nice perfumes.
3.  An Honest Trader, with a dark secret.
4.  Insane Cult Leader, believes the world is flat.
5.  Crossbreed Dinosaur & Robot that is self aware.
6.  Punk Rock Minstrel Pixies.
7.  Piranha Men that can breath on land, and fly!
8.  Enraged Princess stuck between two planes of existence, appears as a shimmer.
9.  A demon who likes to spend time gardening.
10.  Vampire with a lust for collecting rodents.
11.  Old knight who was betrayed by his squire.
12.  A monk who learned to bend time.
13.  A balding sorceresses looking for a wig of Chimera hair.
14.  A goblin tribe famous for their cheese, their herd of cows has been stolen by an unruly Minotaur.
15.  A human thief who has had his arms magically replaced with tentacles.
16.  A deposed lord with a major gambling addiction.
17.  A witch who made a pact with a evil allicorn.
18.  Giant who spends most of his time building a fort made entirely out of large trees from nearby forest.
19.  Pirates trying to return an evil treasure.  (whoops stole that one!)
20.  The ghost of murdered bride (her husbands father was the murderer!).

d20 Random Desert Encounters

Venturing out of the city of Yahleui on the continent of Crimhuck you enter into the the barren wasteland of the Regla desert. 

Obviously this could work for any (some) desert encounters. 

1.  A drunken wastrel sleeping under a cactus.  

2.  A small colony of unintelligent humans living in sand caves. 

3.  Group of hunters looking for a particular type of large snake.

4.  A very old stone structure, filled with weird runes that are unreadable. 

5.  An area that is extremely hazy, walking thru it could lead to another dimension entirely. 

6.  Sand storm!  find shelter. 

7.  A encampment that includes a witch who apparently can see the future. 

8.  Built into the side of a cave is a small gambling drinking den called the "Snake bite".  

9.  Weird metallic tracks that go on for miles, separated by 2 feet between them. 

10.  A very large, covered in sand half destroyed airship. 

11.  An eroded stone with markings on it, leading to a long lost treasure, (or certain doom?) 

12.  Two hungry pack animals tied to a cactus, beside them are the bodies of two humans, they are quite disheveled. 

13.  Over heard the vultures circle, the farther you travel, the farther they follow. 

14.  A pack of wild boars fighting a very large cat.  

15.  The skull of a giant beast, of which is four times the size of a horse. 

16.  A large nest made of random bits of vegetation.  Within it is a large human sized egg. 

17.  A group of travelers that are extremely lost, they are looking for a lizardmen city. 

18.  30 warriors dressed in light armour brandishing spears, emblazoned on their chests a red rose.  (These are members of a group of slavers).  

19.  Huge holes in the ground that are 20 feet wide, and unfathomably deep. (very large sandworm tunnels).

20.  A skeleton staked to a large wooden pole.  Around its neck is a pendant.  Inside a small note detailing a lost city and its whereabouts.